It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize
