His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
