sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
