i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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