Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Randomize
