Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
