Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Randomize
