i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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