I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
