So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
