We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
