i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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