chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Im part way to drunk.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize