why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
