I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Randomize
