some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
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Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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