According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
you didnt know i had herpes?
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
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No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
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Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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