That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
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