and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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