He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
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