You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I forgot how hot balto sounded
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
