U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
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