im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Randomize
