I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
