is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
