Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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