Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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