she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I just got carded by a ten year old.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
