if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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