Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
there's paper in my vomit.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Randomize
