ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize
