If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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