yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Randomize