Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Randomize
