if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize