Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket http://tfl.nu/jdxn
  Replies (42) Good night (751) Bad night (4851)
• Favorite

  (806): View more from Texas

  How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (806): How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking. http://tfl.nu/9w1c
  Replies (11) Good night (4158) Bad night (794)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet http://tfl.nu/ttdp
  Replies (41) Good night (5579) Bad night (1681)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride http://tfl.nu/4fyt
  Replies (34) Good night (20934) Bad night (1942)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you http://tfl.nu/aqjq
  Replies (8) Good night (3003) Bad night (1364)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned http://tfl.nu/z9a2
  Replies (4) Good night (898) Bad night (1905)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you http://tfl.nu/3p9a
  Replies (10) Good night (964) Bad night (1592)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly http://tfl.nu/e7hc
  Replies (6) Good night (1820) Bad night (1398)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her. http://tfl.nu/mjsv
  Replies (14) Good night (765) Bad night (1343)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage. http://tfl.nu/p8gy
  Replies (13) Good night (568) Bad night (2163)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  It's definitely revenge time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes. (1-248): It's definitely revenge time. http://tfl.nu/qj5v
  Replies (1) Good night (591) Bad night (369)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night

  (1-651): View more from Minnesota

  i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  you win. again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night (1-651): i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning (651): you win. again. http://tfl.nu/icl2
  Replies (1) Good night (906) Bad night (335)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball. http://tfl.nu/wrky
  Replies (0) Good night (184) Bad night (339)
• Favorite

  (447): View more from

  Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (447): Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me http://tfl.nu/h1iu
  Replies (1) Good night (257) Bad night (327)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season http://tfl.nu/yswe
  Replies (2) Good night (366) Bad night (119)

Randomize