I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Randomize
