OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
We're too hungover to prance.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
