she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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