I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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