We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Houston, we have a squirter
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
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