so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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