You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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