Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
