R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
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he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
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And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
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