Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
