love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
