They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize