So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
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I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
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Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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