Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
