I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
